September 4, 2020

I have a secret.

Dog mom, Life, Me, Real life


When I made the choice in April to end my dog, Benny's suffering, I was completely set on waiting awhile to get a puppy. As much as Benny was my p&j (pride and joy) he came with a lot of worry, burden, concern. Traveling, as much as I love it, would bring me a great deal of anxiety (which I don't normally have) because I was so worried he'd have a seizure with my parents and I didn't want anyone to carry that burden. I finally got a grip after 10 years of them, lol, but I just worried so much that he'd have one with them, which thank God, he never did.

But because of the weight that came with him, I wanted the freedom! I had a great deal of responsibility to carry with having a special needs dog, and it was finally my time to enjoy things like vacations and candles (triggers for Benny)!

Then Covid.

How many times have you started a sentence with "Then Covid"??

Piper, our (my sister's technically) 8 year old, started to really become depressed. Eating pretty scarcely, so mopey, and just sad. She missed her bestie. It was about then that I realized Covid was ruining the rest of the year, I wouldn't be doing any traveling, so I might as well spice things up and get a puppy. So the search began. '

I found a breeder whom I stalked EXCESSIVELY because of paranoia, lol. I even messaged someone who had gotten a puppy from him before. He had a litter due any day. On 5/31, he sent me a picture of 3 puppies that were available. I was so hesitant to pull the trigger (SO MUCH RESPONSIBILITY) that by the time I chose one, he was gone and my last choice was available (don't tell Hux). I sat on that for about an hour and finally said ok. I put the deposit down that night, and for the next 10 weeks, I watched my baby grow from afar. lol.

My sister actually got a puppy also, about a week before we picked up Hux. She was (is) so tiny, adorable, and loved her crate immediately. No accidents really. She was just so good! I was TERRIFIED that mine would be a complete disaster. And that I wouldn't like him. lol.

The day we picked him up, my sister held him first so I could pay the breeder and take care of the paperwork. When we got into the car and she handed him to me, and I melted. And then he went CRAZY licking my face, just like Benny would. I started laughing and crying because I just knew this little psycho was going to be so similar to Ben (Lord, please no seizures! lol). Since then, I've been completely wrapped around that cute little dew claw-less paw.

He loves his crate at night, and we are getting there during the day. He loves to eat and loses his mind when he hears it being poured into the bowl. He snorts, snores, and licks, just like Ben. When I looked over at him and he was licking the couch, I just about lost it. Hahaha.

Turns out, I was ready for the inconvenience of puppy life. I miss him when I'm at work (when he doesn't come with me!) and I love watching him have the zoomies around the backyard with the girls. But I love bed time the most. He loves to fall asleep on my chest and he really loves The Golden Girls!